Jo’s BJU Approved Blog

My life flows on in endless song;
Above earth’s lamentation
I hear the sweet though far off hymn
That hails a new creation:
Through all the tumult and the strife
I hear the music ringing;
It finds an echo in my soul—
How can I keep from singing?

What though my joys and comforts die?
The Lord my Savior liveth;
What though the darkness gather round!
Songs in the night He giveth:
No storm can shake my inmost calm
While to that refuge clinging;
Since Christ is Lord of Heav’n and earth,
How can I keep from singing?

I lift mine eyes; the cloud grows thin;
I see the blue above it;
And day by day this pathway smoothes
Since first I learned to love it:
The peace of Christ makes fresh my heart,
A fountain ever springing:
All things are mine since I am His—
How can I keep from singing?

-Robert Wadsworth Lowry

Vessel
Safe inside your hands you hold me
Pain and tribulations mold me
I try to run away from you
The pain’s too great you put me through
I find myself on my knees to pray
Then you hear the words you long for me to say

Make of me a vessel that you can always use
No matter how you break me, what i win or what i lose
Let me be a vessel pure and holy, perfect in your eyes
Lord, hear me when i cry, for you to make me, a vessel

Deep inside my heart you’ve shown me
Despite all my sins you’ve known me
I try to run away again
I break your heart with all my sin
I fall to you with tear-filled eyes
I run to you with broken heart and cry

Make of me a vessel that you can always use
No matter how you break me, what i win or what i lose
Let me be a vessel pure and holy, perfect in your eyes
Lord, hear me when i cry, for you to make me, a vessel

Make me into what you want for me to be
Oh, lord, may my prayer be
Make of me a vessel that you can always use
No matter how you break me, what i win or what i lose
Let me be a vessel pure and holy, perfect in your eyes
Lord, hear me when i cry, for you to make me, a vessel
Oh lord make me, a vessel

I Do Not Love Thee
 
by Caroline Elizabeth Sarah Norton

I do not love thee!—no! I do not love thee!
And yet when thou art absent I am sad;
And envy even the bright blue sky above thee,
Whose quiet stars may see thee and be glad.

I do not love thee!—yet, I know not why,
Whate’er thou dost seems still well done, to me:
And often in my solitude I sigh
That those I do love are not more like thee!

I do not love thee!—yet, when thou art gone,
I hate the sound (though those who speak be dear)
Which breaks the lingering echo of the tone
Thy voice of music leaves upon my ear.

I do not love thee!—yet thy speaking eyes,
With their deep, bright, and most expressive blue,
Between me and the midnight heaven arise,
Oftener than any eyes I ever knew.

I know I do not love thee! yet, alas!
Others will scarcely trust my candid heart;
And oft I catch them smiling as they pass,
Because they see me gazing where thou art.

I’m not normally an FFH fan, but I felt like I related to the lyrics of this one when I heard it the other day.

Every Now and Then

Every now and then I get a little wrapped up in myself and
I can’t see You reaching
Every now and then I get a little overwhelmed and
I can’t hear you calling
But you have any ways told me you will always be there
You are only a prayer away

CHORUS:
Every now and then you whisper peace to me
With your tender words- unexpectedly
When I’m at the end taking my last breath
Drowning in my pride I’ve got nothing left
I can see it coming ’round the bend
Yeah, you’re taking me to that place again
Every now and then

Every now and then I get a little tired of my reflection and I want to break the mirror
And every now and then I get blinded by my own perception and-
I need to see you clearer
But you have always told me you will always be there
You are only one prayer away

My pastor mentioned this passage in his sermon today. I love this passage. It never fails to both encourage and convict me
Hebrews 12:1-4 (ESV)

1Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, 2looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. 3Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted. 4In your struggle against sin you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood

Still waiting…I still haven’t heard back from Marquette, so hopefully tomorrow. I guess I’ll go ahead and check out the school in PA next if this doesn’t work out. Long day at work today. I’ve worked 10 and I still have 2 left. Fun times…I practically live here right now, but I am thankful for the job.

Run To You-Ginny Owens
I used to see the world in black and white
Now I find myself lost in a fog of grey
I thought the good guys always won the fight
But I’ve learned life simply doesn’t work that way
I once believed if I loved others they would love me too
But I’ve seen that isn’t always so
I thought the inner peace would come from trusting who I am
But it’s really about trusting who I know

So when the winds of change try to blow me over
And the shadows of confusion hide the truth
I will hope in the One who is forever
I will run to You
I will run to You

Ever since the moment life began
Humankind has tried to solve its mysteries
So many things we cannot comprehend
So we draw conclusions that we can believe
Well, I know that Your hands have placed the earth upon the seas
And pitched a tent in the Heavens for the sun
The Author of the universe is the Father who loves me
So only one conclusion can be drawn

When I face the questions that seem to have no answers
And I know my friends are but a precious few
I will hope in the Love that never changes
I will run to You

Though the perils of life seem so great
And hope seems so frail
You never fail, no
Shadows may not disappear
But You’ve always made it clear
Truth will prevail
You will prevail

“Stained Glass Masquerade”

Casting Crowns

Is there anyone that fails
Is there anyone that falls
Am I the only one in church today feelin’ so small

Cause when I take a look around
Everybody seems so strong
I know they’ll soon discover
That I don’t belong

So I tuck it all away, like everything’s okay
If I make them all believe it, maybe I’ll believe it too
So with a painted grin, I play the part again
So everyone will see me the way that I see them

Are we happy plastic people
Under shiny plastic steeples
With walls around our weakness
And smiles to hide our pain
But if the invitation’s open
To every heart that has been broken
Maybe then we close the curtain
On our stained glass masquerade

Is there anyone who’s been there
Are there any hands to raise
Am I the only one who’s traded
In the altar for a stage

The performance is convincing
And we know every line by heart
Only when no one is watching
Then we really fall apart

But would it set me free
If I dared to let you see
The truth behind the person
That you imagine me to be

Would your arms be open
Or would you walk away
Would the love of Jesus
Be enough to make you stay

So I ended up getting off work early tonight so I could actually go to prayer meeting. Yea! I love my church up here. Everyone seems so sincere. I’ve been to so many churches where everyone tries to present themselves as super spiritual or some people just seem bored of church. Tonight when everyone was praying, it was just moving to hear people talking to God from their heart. Well I’m heading off to bed. I am super tired, and I have another long day of work tomorrow. Today I find out whether or not I will be student teaching up here.

So…plans have changed. As of Friday morning, I thought I was moving to Delaware in August when I got back from China, but now I have to find a new school to student teach at. I decided to try to come back here and pursue Faith Baptist. I thought I was done up here, but I guess God has other plans for me which I am sure are obviously far better than the ones I had for myself. I should know by Tuesday if I can do my student teaching up here. I have lots of other options, I am just really going to have to pray about it to decide where to go if this does not work out. I’m praying that God will make it super clear because I have no idea. This Delaware thing was pretty set.

Also my “special friend” broke up with me after 6 months. It is kinda funny because I had recently called things off with him, but we worked some things out and I was ready to give him a second chance. I did not realize I was starting to compromise, but at church Wednesday night some missionaries were showing their slides and talking about their ministries and I realized that is where my heart is. That is not however where Andy’s heart is which may be fine, but I need to find someone on the same page as I am. I was going to call him Thursday night because I couldn’t wait until the weekend when he was supposed to call again, but he actually contacted me Thursday morning before work and said that he was going to stop pursuing me because we were headed in different directions. I’m glad God worked in both of our hearts so I did not have to feel like I had hurt Andy or anything. I’m sorry that it took us this long to figure out that we were not headed in the same direction, but I’ve learned a lot through it and I think I know better now what I am looking for.

God is always good and always in control. I look forward to what plans he has for me.

I’m promise I’m not really bitter but I always have an official break up song for every relationship and here is my official break-up song dedicated to Andy. Here you go:

Somebody More Like You Nickel Creek lyrics
Artist: Nickel Creek
Album: Why Should The Fire Die?
Year: 2005

I didn’t hear you say you’re sorry
The fault must be mine
I wish you all the best of luck
At finding somebody more like you

You said you’d love me always, truly
I must have changed
Cause you don’t need me like you used to
I hope you find somebody more like you

I hope you finally find someone
Someone that you trust
And give them everything
I hope you meet someone your height
So you can see eye-to-eye
With someone as small as you

You came out of nowhere, made me smile
Then tore me in two
Saying, “We’re very different people”
So dear, I hope you find somebody more like you

I’m back to hanging out with my good buddy Emily. We used to hang out all the time, but I’ve hardly seen her in the last 4 months so we’ve been catching up. Yesterday we went to Pier’s Gorge and then to the little league game of her coworker’s son. It was nice to get out and do something. We’ve had some good talks too. It is funny how different our lives are and yet how similar our struggles are.

Chris Rice
8th Grade
remember the days when life was not so mysterious
follow me down the hall to the cafeteria
where the worst thing i could mess up
was dipping yesterday’s corn dog in last week’s ketchup
back in the 8th grade

Step out into the hall and feel the moment pass
Slam the locker, there’s the bell, we’re running to class
‘Cause Mr. Jackson told us,”Don’t be late to geometry again”
We’re back in the 8th grade

I drop my books, sit down and mess with my hair
Suzie looks at me and smiles, I’m walking on air
Then I hear my name, I missed the question, I mumble something
The class is laughing, oh i love the 8th grade

*chorus*
Why does the past always seem safer?
Maybe because at least we know me made it
And why do we worry about the future?
When every day will come just the way the Lord ordained it
You can believe it, yeah, just like the 8th grade

Proverbs 3:5-7
Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD, and turn away from evil

As I hand in my last paper, and study for my last test, and hand in my last devo accountability, etc. I can’t believe it is finally over. It has taken me 5 years, and I still have student teaching left, but I’m done here. So weird…I actually have to grow up and do something with my life. Why was I in a hurry for this moment to get here? Exciting and scary both…

Anyway I remember listening to this song the year I graduated from highschool, and it just brought back memories. Here I am at this point again, a lot closer to 25 now though…

This one goes out to all my NBBC homies.

“Graduation (Friends Forever)”

And so we talked all night about the rest of our lives
Where we’re gonna be when we turn 25
I keep thinking times will never change
Keep on thinking things will always be the same
But when we leave this year we won’t be coming back
No more hanging out cause we’re on a different track
And if you got something that you need to say
You better say it right now cause you don’t have another day
Cause we’re moving on and we can’t slow down
These memories are playing like a film without sound
And I keep thinking of that night in June
I didn’t know much of love
But it came too soon
And there was me and you
And then we got real blue
Stay at home talking on the telephone
We’d get so excited, we’d get so scared
Laughing at ourselves thinking life’s not fair
And this is how it feels

As we go on
We remember
All the times we
Had together
And as our lives change
Come Whatever
We will still be
Friends Forever

So if we get the big jobs
And we make the big money
When we look back now
Will our jokes still be funny?
Will we still remember everything we learned in school?
Still be trying to break every single rule
Will little brainy Bobby be the stockbroker man?
Can Heather find a job that won’t interfere with her tan?
I keep, I keep thinking that it’s not goodbye
Keep on thinking it’s a time to fly
And this is how it feels

As we go on
We remember
All the times we
Had together
And as our lives change
Come Whatever
We will still be
Friends Forever

Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now?
Can we survive it out there?
Can we make it somehow?
I guess I thought that this would never end
And suddenly it’s like we’re women and men
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us ’round?
Will these memories fade when I leave this town
I keep, I keep thinking that it’s not goodbye
Keep on thinking it’s a time to fly

This song was sung in chapel today, and I thought that it was just perfect for some situations that I have been dealing with lately. One of my roommates and I have been talking all week about trusting God and how dumb we are when we think our way is better than God’s. So often we make our own plans and manipulate things so they seem to fit into God’s will, but we often don’t seek out what he wants us to do until we realize our plans aren’t working out.

Thy way, not mine, O Lord,
However dark it be;
Lead me by Thine own hand,
Choose out the Path for me.

Smooth let it be, or rough,
It will be still the best;
Winding or straight it leads
Right onward to Thy rest.

I dare not choose my lot;
I would not if I might:
Choose Thou for me, my God,
So shall I walk aright.

Take Thou my cup, and it
With joy or sorrow fill,
As best to Thee may seem;
Choose Thou my good and ill.

Choose Thou for me my friends,
My sickness or my health.
Choose Thou my cares for me,
My poverty or wealth.

Not mine, not mine the choice,
In things both great and small;
Be Thou my guide, my strength,
My wisdom and my all.